I was caught up in a moment of peace when all of the sudden I could sense something in my heart tugging for my ears to be open. I sat with my eyes closed with nothing distracting me. It was as if all the noise I could hear was drawing me to a deeper awareness of the magnitude of this very place in time.
I couldn’t help but run to the place of stillness in my heart. The place where everything seems to fade and its just me alone there. Even as I write this I sense the urge to return time and time again. He leads me to calm waters within the vast oceans of my heart. Like an Oak tree planted beside streams of living water, I found myself there in quietness where I could even hear a leaf fall miles away. All eyes on Him and ears listening for the sweet voice that comes like a cool rain in the deserts of my soul.
I had been asking many question as I had been in Thailand for a few weeks. Seeing many things that broke my heart. It left me with many questions to ask the Maker of the human heart. Not just about the things I had seen, but real honest heart to heart questions about humans and their hearts.
There I was, one foot on Earth and the other in a space that only He can meet me.
So it began…
Many of my questions would be answered in this moment. Finally the pondering of my heart would be concluded. He didn’t talk to me about all the heart breaking things I had seen. He didn’t give me some grand vision about how to save people from the Sex Trading Industry. He took that time and He made it extra personal. He told me about ME! I am asking about things that could potentially (in my mind) change the world and you want to speak to me about my heart?
Shay- There are idols everywhere. No place is immune to running to something outside of me and worshipping it. You asked me about the human heart. You have seen the way other cultures deal with idols. I ask you how do you deal with Idols…?
I am quick to respond as an American. I would say “Lord, that as an american, we place our selves as idols. We are quick to run to the throne of self and worship. Feeding ourself what ever our “self” so desires.”
Shay- I am talking about you. Idols look different in your life. They aren’t out in the open like in many other nations. Your trip up is IDLE. Idleness. Idle talk. Idle time. You ask about the human heart and I am showing your own as an example. When you live in “idleness”, you can’t see what or how I see. I see from a place of purpose and passion. Idleness is the opposite of who I am. Even when I rest it is purposeful. When i talk it is life giving and life changing. As you head back to America, the nature of idleness will attempt to creep in. In a land full of many things surrounding you and many options constantly being thrown at you, make it a point to not be idle. Take all that was learned in Africa and Thailand and apply it to your life. It doesn’t matter where you are located, you must not fall into idleness. It will be easy to “go with the flow” of what is around you. This is that place in me that you protect and you hold to tightly. For it is the place that life flows from. Do not let your words and time become idle. Words that cause a movement or an awakening in someone. Time that is spent investing to all those around you. Idleness will drain your purpose and open doors of questioning. I urge you daughter to fight the good fight of faith by standing against idleness.
Idleness sows seeds into hearts and this is what stirs up many doors and options in ones heart to be thought about. This is also a way for many lies and decieving thoughts to enter into ones heart. Its in this place that we must fight war. We must stand against all things that aren’t truth. You asked about human hearts and this is what I see. Many people gave into their idleness and now they are searching for satisfaction that can only be found in me, but they run to idols of all shapes and sizes for a quick fix. I urge you to walk with purpose in the land of people searching for purpose and walk with hope in a land full of people needing hope. Walk in a manner worthy of your calling. A calling to be love and give hope and walk in my image to all those around you.
If you guard your heart from idleness you won’t fall into worshipping Idols.
There I was sweetly broken before the Lord. Feeling broken and yet whole at the same time. Emptied but filled. Peaceful yet heart pounding.
It has been a month of being back in the states. I have clung to my time with Him. these words still get to me in the best way. i have been turned upside down by the one who formed me. The one who knows me inside and out in that moment dealt with my heart in the most gentle way, setting me free from things that so easily beset me. The truth is, before I left I wouldn’t tell you I had a lot of idle time. I would say I am a very purposeful person. What I see now that I am back after almost 4 months of being overseas, isn’t that i lived in purpose. I lived a life of being consumed. On the outside I was giving and giving, constantly my phone would go off, so and so needing this or that and me being there to help in whatever way I could. This doesn’t sound bad at all. It became an idol to me when i couldn’t focus on the person in front of me talking due to my phone blowing up. It went “south” when in great or even in not so great conversations, I pick up my phone to check facebook not even knowing that what I am doing. This doesn’t look like love to the other person. Out of a looking “purposeful”, to be honest, there were many times I was idle. I see that in hindsight now. Now, I guard my time. I am not perfect at all. I have fallen in love with the “airport” button on my phone. My time with the Lord isn’t full of ” hold on Lord that is so and so and I need to get that done quick” My time spent with Him is undistracted and beyond purposeful. It is from that place that my words can breathe life and be full of love towards those around me causing their hearts to grow as well! I am a work in progress for sure! Yet one thing is for sure, Idols and Idles will never be looked at the same again for I have been wrecked in the best way!