Today’s society lives in a constant tension of wanting to be known and connected to everyone and everything. This is such a beautiful thing, however, it can open us up to some hardship if we aren’t careful. I have recently been sharing about our heart and the way to make sure that in a pressured society we don’t let just anyone and everyone into that sacred place. You can call me “old-school” but I believe that not everyone should be allowed into your heart as quick as a Facebook friend request or an Instagram follow.

I have been using the illustration of ~ a hotel versus a home. We are to treat hearts like homes. I know that may sound odd, especially if you live in a wild home, but stay with me! Your heart should be treated like a well taken care of investment. Let me start by explaining how your heart is not a hotel. Hotel living, although nice in many ways, is simply a temporary place to lay your head. We are so quick to allow people into our hearts who don’t invest into our lives, similar to the way that we normally wouldn’t invest into a hotel room. Sure you may pay to sleep there, but you aren’t investing time in this room. We so easily give the keys to our heart away as if we are okay with people coming and going as they please. If we were to value our heart in a healthier way, we wouldn’t let just anyone into those sacred places. The same way you probably don’t allow just anyone a key to your home, your heart should not be a hotel that people are able to come in and temporarily take advantage of.

For much of my life, I didn’t value myself enough to figure out who was safe and healthy for my heart and who was there just to benefit from my life. I didn’t realize that those who really love you will be intentional and pursue you in relationship. You don’t have to hand the key to your heart over to anyone who walks by. As I have gotten older and healthier in my identity in Christ, I have realized that not everyone should have a seat at the table of my heart and a key to my house. Those who get that have shown themselves as safe by loving me unconditionally. They have shown that they are interested in a relationship by not simply coming in and out as the wind blows, but by investing time, tears, laughs, vulnerability and love into me. And to top it off, you think running a home is crazy? I can’t even begin to tell you how much more crazy it all becomes when you continue to treat your heart like a hotel.

So learn from me and stop allowing whoever into your heart. You are more valuable than that. You are worth having safe and healthy people in your life that love like Christ does. I know that people can come and go and some friends are seasonal, but even still, every heart should be treated with investment and love. Treat other people’s hearts like a home; with love and value. Value people by speaking life. Don’t just be in relationships with people for your benefit. I dare you to evaluate the way you are letting people in your heart and as you start to value yourself, you will see deep relationships blossom and become all that God intended them to be. My mom used to tell me, “shay, when you go to someone’s house you better leave it cleaner than when you got there.” This should be said of us as we love people where they are.